Side effects of hormones?

I can't remember anything. I wanted to make a post and now I don't know what I was going to talk about.
I'll just leave some random tidbits then.

I just found out about Chateau Avalon, which is a themed romance getaway hotel concept place. So I checked out their page. You can view all the different suites. I think some of the themes are reaching a little bit and some of them are cool and some could use some more work. So I was curious how much it cost for something like that, I didn't find a price list but I went into the page to make reservations and picked a random date a long ways into the future (not my anniversary or anything...) to see what was offered. The prices range from $129 to like $400and something. I think it is kind of overpriced and I can't picture myself doing it anyway. I think I'd feel embarrassed and cheesy being in the 'Camelot' bed or the 'Serengeti' bathtub. And maybe I'm not looking at it right, but the tubs look like big bathtubs to me and strange to have a bathtub right next to the bed. Maybe if they wanted it to have more ambiance they could get some tubs that weren't white. Just doesn't look like a sexy jacuzzi to me.
I swear, I don't want to go there. At all. Even if they do put rose petals on your bed and give you champagne and chocolate strawberries.
(Husband if you read this, that's called sarcasm. Let's go sit in an un-sexy bathtub in a goofy hotel!)

What else?
I still haven't finished writing Robby's story and I am so close. I promised myself I would do it for today/yesterday because he's 3 months now, but I didn't even open it today. I'm a slacker.

He went to the doctor today, and surprisingly he only weighs 16lbs6.4oz. I know it is still a hefty baby, but that is about what he weighed when I weighed him a few weeks back. So I was expecting him to be more by now. I don't know why I'm complaining, I have to carry him around all the damn time. He is 25.5 inches long and his head circumference is 17 inches. Strikes me that he seems to be about the size of a 6 month old, but he is 'on the charts' at 95%. I am pretty much the kind of mom that doesn't get caught up in the size stuff, except when I first get the update.
Then I brag just a little, after all at this point, it's all between me and God. You know? It makes me so happy and proud to know that my baby grew so big and strong inside of me and that I'm able to continue nourishing him with my milk and my love for him to be such a large, healthy, happy boy. It's tangible proof that I'm doing something right.

Not that moms of babies who are small or have illnesses or disorders or who are fussy or high-needs are doing anything wrong. They're only doing something wrong if they bottle-feed.



I kid, I kid! I hope nobody reads that who doesn't know me and get it as humor. Lactivism is only going to work if we can promote the normalization of breastfeeding without insulting and alienating those who we are trying to convert.

But back from that tangent, I'm just happy to be carrying around such a noticeable and positive example that you can birth and feed a baby naturally, using only your own body, in the way that God made you to and it will work out perfect.

People (strangers) really don't believe me that he was not a c-section and that he doesn't "get anything to eat" (their words). Obviously he eats plenty of milk, even if it isn't "real milk" (their words again).

And the sad truth is that you won't often see another baby like mine because women aren't allowed to have trust in their bodies and so much of the American birth culture now is about having control over every unknown.
If I had been under monitoring from an OB or even a hospital midwife during the last 4-8 weeks of my pregnancy, I would have probably been scheduled for an induction because the baby was getting big.
After I went to 41 and then 42 weeks and beyond, I would definitely have been induced for being overdue.
In my 9 hours of labor, I would have probably been taken in for a c-section when the baby was not descending into my pelvis, had I been in a hospital.
That's if my c-section wasn't already scheduled for suspicion of big baby that wouldn't fit through my vagina.
If a doctor would have had a clue about me, he would have never been as big as he was, they don't "let" babies get that big.
If I somehow escaped all of these interventions and micromanagement, when I delivered an 11 pound baby in a hospital they would have taken him away immediately for blood sugar testing and insisted that he needed a bottle because such a big baby would be going hungry and I couldn't expect to feed him.

I am so grateful and happy that I stuck to my guns and didn't buy into the hype and fear that is swirling around mothers in our country. There was something about this pregnancy that I just knew I needed to do it on my terms the way I was created to.

Even in all the horror afterwards, I was aware that everything would be fine if we left well enough alone.
I love having this experience now so I can tell my own story and prove that I actually do know what I am talking about.

Sidenote-the doctor today said Robby has mastered all of the physical milestones for 4 months (only missing out on squealing) and that along with his size just has me joking again. Some babies are born prematurely and their parents know their real age from when they were actually born and then their adjusted age from their expected due date. I know that it is very serious and not a joking matter to have a preemie, but I keep thinking about how Robby could have a reverse adjusted age.
He's only been alive for 3 months, but he could easily have been born 4 months ago and be just as healthy and wonderful. I see moms with teeny-tiny little newborns and they are just carrying them around in public, it is so startling to me!
People are regularly birthing babies half the size of the baby I had! I have to check myself because I get wistful and sad that I never had that teeny newborn time and I do miss it. When Robby was that size, it was probably like January or something. I was months away from getting to see his face or hold him to my breast. I start to pine for another pregnancy...but what if next time I have an even bigger baby that stays in for even longer???

There's a downside to everything. I'm super proud of myself and of him for his size, but it's like I missed out on a whole phase of his development.
Ok, I'm just yammering on out because I need to get to bed so I'll quit now.